When I realized I wanted to learn drawing (in 2012, at the age of 32) my first thought was:
“But I can’t. I’m too old. It’s too late. I’m not talented … etc. etc.” (you know the ramble)
But because I had a difficult time in my life (after a quite shattering breakup) I NEEDED something to express myself and this SOMETHING had to be something other than “just words”.
So I started drawing anyway, regardless of my avid inner critic (who looks like a thin and haggard librarian, by the way, and who is – I’m quite sure about that – somehow related to Marcel Reich-Ranicki).
This is one of my very first drawings (Did I listen to Billie Holiday a lot? Hell yeah!)
So these few depressing weeks were illuminated by my new-found love for drawing.
Then I did, what scared and inhibited perfectionists always do: I bought the stuff.
I bought tons of art supplies, a collection of indian ink by Rohrer&Klinger (which intense colours I still love), watercolours, paper, pens etc. etc.
I also bought a lot of great books:
But in spite of all these (nonetheless quite inspiring) stalling tactics, I started drawing. It just made me feel good. I sat down on a Saturday afternoon, listened to an audio book and after a few weeks I suddenly realized, that this was what I had been doing as a little girl all the time: Listening to stories, drawing and getting lost in my own world.
I re-connected to something that I had completely lost over the years of becoming an adult and from that point on it got easier.
But I can’t. And that’s not a ramble, but a fact.
So to get rid of my annoying fear/perfectionism, I decided to start a sketchbook, trying to do at least one drawing a week.
I also decided to publish these drawings every Sunday – first of all probably because I want to get rid of that stifling feeling of needing to be a great artist right away.
By just showing other people that I’m not I myself can accept that I’m not and that I don’t need to be.
And because I’m not really a very disciplined person, I also want to learn to stick to a routine and a deadline.
So, every Sunday, I will publish my recent drawing(s) – starting today!
Thanks for stopping by and: Trust in what you love:)